Friday, August 05, 2011
I'll start a new day..
Last night I couldn't sleep well.. I had a lot in my mind and I started crying.. I couldn't sleep till 6a.m I think..
People may think that my life is perfect here & there.. Friends keep asking me for advice in their relationship, but reality check ==> my hardship sucks! I'm no good in this.. People I helped keep achieving success every time they listen to my advice.. I myself was the experiment & those friends I helped is the success conclusion of my ugly past..
I'm finally ridin' solo because I don't think I have the full commitment yet.. Him & I, I would describe us as close friends that called each other sweet names .. We lack all those qualities that couple suppose to have.. I think maybe because we only had so little time knowing each other that I only know so little about him.. I told him last night about what came across my mind cause I can't stop crying thinking about us, he is definitely the nicest guy I had ever known, he understand me well & still smile for me saying "Anything that makes you happy, makes me happy.. I don't want you to feel strangled.. Sure! We're always be friends..hahaha...& yes i'll be there when you need me.."
I hope I could learn to accept & appreciate as I grew older & mature..
As for now we are close friends..
God forgive me for doing what my heart's desire, but I think I need to do this so both him & I won't be disappointed with each other..
We will still be friends for now..